Colloquial Language in essays!! Is it fine??

Today while taking a call with one of the clients i came up with a revolutionary idea about writing the essays. But my concern - "Is it fine to be totally myself in the essay??" For example -- i love to use smileys ... !!! marks...and colloquial language...i know that too much of colloquial language can write me off...but if i pour my heart out in 1 of the 4 essays, then is it fine?? I re-wrote one of the essay for a school....and got some great compliments from my friends...The new approach made the essay really humorous and fun to read...but the compliments came with a statutory warning -- KT -- you will be taking a big risk by submitting this essay.....it can make or break your case...

I want to ask fellow bloggers/consultants/students/ {and adcoms - if u have the time to read this blog :)} ... can i be myself in one of the essays??

PS: I am feeling really great about this essay....i think i wrote my previous drafts under the influence of the matter that i have read/heard .... is it fine to be original??

Leadership Essay - Kellogg + Kaneisha Grayson

I had no plans of writing any blog post but yesterday i re-worked on Kellogg essay 2 that wants the applicants to share their key leadership experiences. This is one of the most challenging essays i have faced till now. with 600 words at hand how to share key leadership experiences and then also share the leadership areas that one hopes to develop while pursuing the MBA.

I shared my draft with Kaneisha of theartofapplying. Actually she offered to proof read my essay and help me with it...Must say that despite of being busy with her clientele she helped me in real quick time. Kaneisha not only pointed at the exact shortcomings of my essay but also suggested ways to improve upon it. The idea was right there on paper but i wasn't able to put it down concisely and effectively...Kaneisha's comments helped me in doing so...Now my essay looks a lot better...Thanks Kaneisha for your wonderful support!!! And very soon i would like to have a detailed discussion with her around the app process and how she can help the applicants who started late...{believe me i am not being paid anything to write this :) ... but i wish i were paid a few dollars ;) }...

Now coming back to essay...in order to tackle this question..don't simply focus on "WHAT"...its redundant to tell the ad-com what you did...because in one way or the other your resume/data sheet or reco will convey the ehat part,,...

Answer the whys/hows in as much depth as possible and with vivid example...whyswill help the ad-com in understanding your passions...and hows will help the ad-com in understanding your personality..+ what traits you developed in the process and what is it that you bring to the table...

lets take an example...I lead my undergrad soccer team to a victory in inter college soccer tournament. We won the cup and $10, 000 in cash..our feat was highlighted by local papers and channels alike..i was nominated the man of the match ... i scored 4 goals in final and 12 in the tournament...Do you think this is going to help??

During the final year of my undergrad dgree i was given the responsibility to lead the college soccer team. With most of the senior players already out of college i was facing the challenge to construct the team and motivate the players to perform well in inter college tourna....i analyzed the strengths and weaknesses of our team and realized that our defense suffered a major blow as the seniors {who were playing in defense positions} moved out...i changed my position from a centre forward to central mid fielder..to support the weakend defense..revised our strategy...instead of playin 4-4-3, i used 2-3-5...bla bla...obviously u want to convey the challenge and your approach in a concise manner..not like me...finally i asked my team to give their best..i told them that if u guys can pull it off you will be hot properties in college with lots of girls going ga ga over you...{i used the right carrot to motivate the team..;)} ...

Also, as i did last year...i checked the GMAT distrib of incoming class at Kellogg and here is the analysis

Gmat Score (UP TO 640)    (650 - 690)     (700 - 740)    (750-800)

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Enrolled Students 12% {71}  23% {135}     48% {282}  16% {100}

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Total Applicants    6% {316}  20% {1054}   52% {2740} 23% {1212}

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Acceptance Rate        22.47%      12.81%        10.29%       8.25%

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Interesting trend..and i kept on fretting about GMAT score

Apps Update!!!

I have been busy for past few days...Swimming/Yoga in the morning...Office -- busy preparing presentations for enterprise wide strategy...leading projects...miss S is not keeping well for past few days so that's a big reason for worry...during night i work on my apps...{1-2 hours daily}....

Kellogg -- drafts were submitted to reviewer....got some really good suggestions....need to work on suggestions......discussed my case with both my recommendors...more or less sealed....started working on part 1 of app...plan to submit it in next 7-8 days

Fuqua -- a basic outline complete for 2/3 questions...plan to work on it Oct-10 onwards {will be applying during Nov deadline}

Booth -- Started working on app but i feel i am going to go down with fever/cold n cough...:'(

Strengths -- quantiatively speaking, i have good acads, decent score, nice depth and breadth of work ex, good extra currics, leadership experience

Weaknesses -- qualitatively speaking, i am unable to put my thoughts on paper {oops on word doc}.I write good stories with regards to wat happened , wat were the consequences but fail to reveal "MY" contributions..Not good!!!

Opportunity -- Started early so have plenty of time to make necessary changes to my ESSAYS!!!

Threat -- Might become complacent..or wear out before the final race

Chugging ahead...

Made some good progress over the weekend, had a call with my first reviewer and worked on my K essays. Must admit that final product is looking better {i hope ad-com likes my essays..}. Now is the time to get the essays reviewed by 2nd and final reviewer {who happens to be a Kellogg student}. So more or less i am on my way to meet my self imposed deadline of Aug-15 for completing the K essays.

Started working on Fuqua application this morning. Essay-1 {career goals} seemed easy but when i started working on it, i realized that i simply cannot use my Kellogg essay. I have used the theme of Kellogg essay-1 {obviously my story isn't going to change} but Fuqua essay is going to be a lot more elaborate. And, Fuqua doesn't even ask "why Fuqua" in essay-1 {that's kept for Essay-3}...Essay-1 has started taking shape and i plan to wrap it up by tomorrow. Want to finish Fuqua App by Aug-24 and then send it to reviewers...

Post that i will have time till Sep-15 {almost 20 days} to complete 2 other apps...And i forgot to mention the recommendations :'(((((((( .... 60 days from now and I can see myself getting nervous ....

Lambastedddd!!!

My first reviewer shared his thoughts on my essays and i must admit that the comments were an "eye-opener".

To do:
1. Individual essays are not fitting into the bigger picture - According to my reviewer, my essays are fine content wise but all the essays taken together do not create a comprehensive/clear picture of me. I need to work on Essay-1 {career goal/why mba} and Essay -4{best mistake ever made} ...Essay 1 is going to drive the central theme and essay 4 will support it...
2. Few gramatical mistakes -- need to correct them

Good thing -- Essay 3 {how do i see my student evaluator evaluating my app} -- i got some really great comments or shall i say compliments on this one..so more or less essay3 is freezed ..

Essay - 2 {leadership} is also coming out fine but i need to link the individual paragraphs effectively. Also, the leadership traits demonstrated should come out clearly... need to fine tune this essay...

I have been blogging about taking the bigger picture into consideration but i failed to do so. I think we get attached to our ideas and fail to see the gap...highly recommended that you get your essays reviewed by some trust-worthy people...to find out whether your story is making sense and whether your story is coming out nicely....

On a side note...i have started researching Fuqua...and with each passing day i am falling in love with the school...{am already in love with Fuqua but the bond is getting stronger...}..will soon start working on Fuqua app...Plan to wrap up all my apps by Sep-15 as i have to attend many marriages starting sep-19....

Half way through

Pretty much on my way to accomplish my self imposed deadline of completing Kellogg essays by Aug-15. Have shared the "draft" {i know i would still need to work on multiple drafts} of my essays with a friend and a awaiting his inputs. One thing that i know for sure is that "team-work" theme is not coming out in my essays. Need to work on this part + got to dig into Kellogg website and got to bug my friends at K for further inputs...

When i shared my essays with my friend i hid the questions, i have asked my friend to tell me what does he think about my essays i.e. what he feels that i am trying to answer. This is an old technique suggested by many succesful candidates and also by admission consultants...

Next in line is Fuqua and i have to start researching Fuqua in a more systematic way.

My only concern is that i might get out of steam before the actual race...starting early is good but at times you peak too early...

Kellogg Essay - 2 !!!!! Helpppppppppp

Essay #2


Describe your key leadership experiences and evaluate what leadership areas you hope to develop through your MBA experiences (600 word limit).

This essay is giving me a real tough time. 15 drafts later i still feel that my response to this essay SUCKSSS!!! I have interesting and impactful anecdotes to share but i am unable to narrate them in an effective manner.
 
I am feeling like a dumb who knows the taste of chocolate but can't explain it...and word limit is also not helping me in this case. I am over-shooting the word limit by well over 16%. I am sharing only 2 experiences and still not able to wrap up my response within the word limit. Someone please teach me the art of crisp writing....

Leadership experience essay

I was thinking about Kellogg's essay on leadership experiences.

Essay #2


Describe your key leadership experiences and evaluate what leadership areas you hope to develop through your MBA experiences (600 word limit).

Word limit - 600, this means that one can share 2 and the most 3 experiences. I decided picking up 2 experiences. Now, a person can demonstrate leadership traits in various spheres of life aka "Professional", "Social-Service", "Extra Currics" etc. It's my personal opinion that one should include 1 experience from outside the professional life. Career assessment done in essay 1 will cover few leadership traits demonstrated in professional life. I chose 2 experiences - representing my efforts in professional and extra currics spheres.

Next, i started thinking about leadership in general and came across the following quote:


"Leaders don't wait. They shape their own frontiers. The bigger the challenge, the greater the opportunity."

I have highlighted few key words in the quote above. In absense of a challenge it's hard to demonstrate true leadership. "Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm but it requires a true leader to steer the ship in stromy seas"

List down all the success stories from your life and now sort them in descending order of the challenge that you faced in each of those incidents. Share the challenge that you faced...Show how you shaped the frontier {crafted the solution to the problem}, show the impact of your solution and don't forget to summarize the learnings from the incident...

Challenge -- Solution-Orientedness -- Impact -- Learning....

I believe any leadership experience essay can be answered while keeping in mind the above mentioned 4 key words....

Suggestions are most welcome!!!!

Career Goals essay

Finally after pain-staking revisions for almost 25 times i have finalized the outline for career goals essay. I think Passion, Aspiration and Vision are essential ingredients of any b-school essay but these 3 play a major role in defining the career goal essay.

Passion-- put down all the things that you have done since starting the professional life. Ask why you attended a particular under-grad college, why you graduated in a particular concentration, why you made certain career moves or joined a particular firm. Now, try to see the common linkage between all your choices. Is there a common theme? Is there something that ignites passion in you and brings out the best in you?? If yes then this will answer the WHY {Passion} part of career goals essay.

Aspirations -- By the time you attempt career goals essay you should be crystal clear about your short term goals after MBA. In many cases this crystal clear vision would be lacking but even in this case you should have a clear idea about the direction in which you want to head.

Now someone might argue that many people change their career aspirations once they attend teh college and nothing is wrong with that. True!! But you don't want to tell the ad-com that you are just meandering aimlessly...YOU HAVE TO SHOW THAT YOU HAVE GIVEN A DUE thought to your career. And you know what is it that you want from the school and how best you would use the school's resources.

Vision -- Leadership and vision go hand in hand. Don't just stop at your short term goal after the MBA. B-schools often rant about producing leaders and they are very serious about it. Show them that you have a vision to be among the higher echeleons of the management. Things that seem impossible right now will become possible once you wear the badge of a particular top b-school....

Crossing the limits!!! - Is it fine???

Lately, i have been thinking hard about "word limits". Is it fine to overshoot the limits given by colleges? I have read mixed responses on this topic. Some say it is fine. If yes, then by what %age? say a college asks you to define your career goals in 400 words, is 410 right or even going upto 460 alright??

And how about falling short?? helpppppppp!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fuqua Announces essays for fall 2011 Entry

Fuqua has announced its essays for the fall 2011 entry. There are only 3 required questions { i guess till last year fuqua had 1 long and 3 short essays}.

The essays are usual b-school essays, asking for why MBA, why Duke and why you. Applicants must respind within 2 pages with a minimum 10 point font, meaning one has about 850 words to frame the answers.

Source

New Essays for Fall 2011 Entry


Three essay questions must be completed before submitting your application. Prepare your essays carefully. The Admissions Committee considers your responses to the following questions important in the selection process. Please respond fully and concisely using 1.5 line spacing. Your response to each question should be no more than 2 pages in length, with a font size no less than 10-point.


Candidates who applied to The Duke MBA between September 2009 and April 2010 are considered re-applicants. All re-applicants are required to complete the Re-applicant Essay in addition to the Applicant Essays.

All applicants have the opportunity to submit an optional essay to explain any extenuating circumstances of which the Admissions Committee should be aware.

Applicant Essays : Answer all 3 essay questions.



Today, companies must navigate through complex and interdependent issues. They must deal with health and security matters, environmental impact questions, and diversity and cultural concerns. Leaders need adaptability, imagination, emotional intelligence, and business acumen. Thus, Duke is in the midst of an ambitious global venture that will embed and connect us around the world, and we are seeking future leaders of consequence, who value diversity and collaborative leadership, and who aspire to impact the companies and communities of which they are a part in a lasting and positive way.



In an effort to identify, engage, and foster the development of future leaders of consequence, the Admissions Committee would like to get to know our applicants in a more holistic manner. We would like to know who you are, what has shaped you into the person you are today, and how you hope to impact both Duke and the communities of which you will be a part in the future. The essays are your opportunity to convey that to us. Please be open, genuine, and passionate. Share with us what makes you a dynamic, multi-dimensional person.





1. Describe your vision for your career and your inspiration for pursuing this career path.


2. How will your background, values, and non-work activities enhance the experience of other Duke MBA students and add value to Fuqua's diverse culture?


3. Why Duke? (If you are interested in a specific concentration, joint degree, clubs or activities, please discuss how you would contribute to these in this essay.)


Optional Essay (not required)


If you feel there are extenuating circumstances of which the Admissions Committee should be aware, please explain them here (e.g., unexplained gaps in work, choice of recommenders, inconsistent or questionable academic performance, significant weakness in your application).


Re-applicant Essay



All re-applicants are required to complete the Re-applicant Essay. Please limit your response to two pages. Write an essay describing how you are now a stronger candidate for admission compared to the application you submitted the previous year.

Update

Just finished working on essays {from previous year} of one of my target schools. Must say that writing Essays is the most difficult, most interesting and most important part of the application. It took me 5-6 iterations for each essay before my story started making SOME {I think 15-20%}sense. Introspection, positioning and knowledge of target school play a huge role in crafting a winning application.

I now need to read all the essays together to get a holistic picture of my positioning effort. This is important -- don't just focus on a single essay. Start by keeping your overall story in mind. Put down everything, small or big that you have achieved in your life. Now based upon the essay segregate stories, as to which story would be used in which essay. Try to link up all the essays to one common theme but reveal different facet of your personality every time. Make sure that your passion and motivation should reflect in essays.

Would enjoy my friday night and from tomorrow back to work ... hope that by next 8-10 days i will have a set of essays that i would be able to share with one of my friend to get some feedback..Also need to explore the school in much more detail I felt that i need to know a lot more about my target schools before i even think of applying to them....

don't know how much sense this post would have made...but just wanted to share some thoughts :)

p.s: I have started thinking about safety schools :'( ... thats a bad sign for sure... hope that by october this thought fades away ..else ..

Career progress and future goals essay

Briefly assess your career progress to date. Elaborate on your future career plans and your motivation for pursuing an MBA. (600 Words)

I was really aghast with myself as i saw the draft of my answer to the question above. I elaborated my career and never assessed the same. And i briefly touched upon the idea as to why i need an MBA. Needless to say, i used 1200 words to shape up my response.

If i want to submit winning essays i really need to understand the question before i started vomiting my useless answers on word pad. The ad-com commitee wants to understand how i have fared in my career till now and what are the various skills that i have acquired and honed. Also, they want to get a flavor of the impact of my work and most importantly want to understand the motivation behind my career moves. Elaboration of my career goals would point towards the skills that i need to acquire.
Wish i had given a lot more time to understanding the question and framing up the answer than just scribbling my thoughts down.

Plan to work on this essay during this weekend and hopefully trim it down to 700 words before finally taking it to 600 word limit.

lots of work!!!!

First rough draft

Before i share my progress i want to share the Sad news!!! CK Prahlad renowned management guru passed away. Indeed sad!! CK was known for his theory - "fortune at bottom of pyramid", applicable in many emerging economies. Also, CK was esteemed faculty member of University of Michigan {Ross B-school}.
May he RIP.

Coming on to the next update -- wrote first rough draft of Career progression and why MBA essay. Must say it looked horrible. Way off the word limits, hardly giving the personal touch and mostly bragging about things that i had already mentioned in my resume.

Its very imp. that an applicant does not repeat the same things as mentioned in his/her resume. Resume mostly reflects "WHAT" part of your story. i.e What an applicant has accomplished. Every school asks for a copy of resume along with the essays. So, ad-com members would be aware of "WHAT" part of the story. I believe that through essays ad-com members are more interested in knowing the real person behind those accomplishments. Essays should answer "WHY" part of the story. i.e Why you made certain choices, why you were able to achieve certain things {as mentioned in your resume} and obviously why an MBA makes sense for you?

After writing the first draft i have decided to think hard about -- "Where i am coming from?", " Why i made certain choices in life and what i learnt from those experiences", " Where do i see myself 5 years, 10yrs from now and what's the motivation behind that.". I guess if i will answer these questions then i will be better able to answer Why MBA in the stipulated word limit.

Also don't forget to be specific in your essays. I think once we have enough degree of specificity in essays we won't have to worry about being unique ;)

Introspection -- Essays

The most important stage during MBA application process is of "INTROSPECTION". One has to be crystal clear about the reasons for pursuing an MBA and reasons for choosing a school. 2 years and $150k would mean a lot to lot of people. I have started giving a thought to essays and bumped across the following piece of advise that i found worth sharing with all the fellow applicants:

{Its important that one gives a due thought to each of the following questions.}

1. Are you a leader in a true sense? A lot of aspirants limit leadership around their team leading experience. Even though it is true to some extent, it hovers around a lot of other areas in your candidature. What is it that makes you a leader in life?

2. Did you ever take an initiative and exceeded expectations of the people around you ? What led you to take that initiative? How did you chart your strategy, and involve your peers in realizing the overall goal for the benefit of the organization or body you have been or were related to?

3. All of us face resistances and friction when we implement ideas? How well do you understand this, and what do you do to perform in the wake of resistance from people who are either associated with or affected by your ideas?

4. Have you managed a group of people? Did you make them realize their full potential?

5. All of us follow prototypes in our day to day lives. Have you ever thought outside the boundaries and worked as a designer who thinks creatively?

6. Are you keen on contributing to the lives of others?
You are a sharp and a dedicated individual at work. However, it takes a while in getting people around you used to your ideas and style of working. How well can you communicate with professionals working with you, and make them understand your goals for the organization?