Humbled by a "Special" guy

I was getting late for my flight and rushed to the lift. As if the lift wasn't descending slowly enough it stopped on the 9th floor. An aged lady entered the lift and stopped the doors from closing. She was waiting for someone. I started getting restless and didn't say anything for 30 seconds or so but then i couldn't resist

'can you please let the doors close, i am getting late'. i was stern (not rude)

'I am waiting for my son' she replied while peeping out of the lift and blocking the door sensors

I cursed her son for taking so long and wasting my "precious" time. If not for the heavy luggage, i would have taken stairs or the other lift.

Few minutes of wait later, that lady's husband and son (who was in his 30s) entered the lift. The old man clutched his son's elbow and the son limped into the lift. The son smiled at her mom for holding the lift and the lady smiled back and affectionately ruffled his hair

This guy was in his thirties but behaved like a 10 ten year old. He had a limp and a spoke with a slur

'hello, i am karan' he slurred and clasped my hand gently between his hands

He was "special", and I immediately felt a chill down my spine. I was choked and immensely embarrassed for my behavior. Karan didn't let go off my hand till we reached the ground floor and kept on passing that infectious smile.

"bye and have a wonderful day" he slurred again smilingly. I was choked but i smiled back and wished him a good day. I held my emotions else a stream of tears would have erupted from my eyes

His parents held his one hand each and escorted him to the car.  I was so moved that i could not move out of the lift. God has blessed me with everything that a man could aspire for and yet i keep on cribbing every now and then. Here was a "special" guy who lived with a zeal, who held people's hands and touched their souls...

Karan - you indeed are special!! Thank you for touching my soul. May god bless you and grant me the wisdom..

I have grown up but my parents are growing old..

Today, my dad called me and told that my paternal uncle is no more. His voice was shaky and i am sure he was crying. Losing the big brother must be hard for him. Even after hanging up the phone i can't get my dad's voice out of my head..it's still echoing there. I can't explain how painful it is for me to realize that my dad was crying and i can't do anything about it. How the times have changed. Time flies..literally, the days have become longer and the years short. Few years back i was the one who was whining and sobbing in front of my parents..seems like i have grown up but my parents are growing old :(

husband

Someone who can make you smile for eternity

Can hold your hand in front of a stupid fraternity

The one who loves watching you sleep

He will be yours forever to keep

The one who loves to feel your breath

Someone who will be with you till the death

With him in your life you will never need a friend

That someone should be your husband…

the veil

in the desert beneath the moonlight
your sensual eyes behind the veil
you tease me and you please me
i lift the veil and kiss your lips
you make me do the crazy things
is it the love or just a dream
why does ur absense invokes this pain

Wish list Wednesday No.4

First of all a big thanks to PS and judges for choosing my post as the winning entry last week.  Also, i got my copy of  which i plan to read this weekend. I hope this book also tops the charts like Preeti's other works.

And now this week's prompt: "i wish everyone loved.....". I gave this topic a prolonged thought and came up with various things that could fit the bill, like - i wish everyone loved their mother/ loved their food/ loved their spouse/ loved themselves/loved their job/loved mother earth and what not.

But, nothing seemed to justify the notion of LOVE, for love can't be confined to an object, person or an idea. After much contemplation i can simply say - i wish everyone "LOVED". I sincerely wish that everyone once in their lifetime truly experience the emotion called love irrespective of whether they love a person/animal or an idea.

I have failed, i have conquered and above all i have evolved as a person when i loved.

Falling in love, i experienced passion -  I skipped heartbeats, I missed few breaths and I dreamt with open eyes. The world became so beautiful that it seemed like heaven. I anticipated for my feelings to be reciprocated and I experienced anxiety when my expression of love went "unanswered/unnoticed".

Waiting for my beloved, i developed patience. While waiting to get a glimpse of those sparkling eyes, sensuous lips and enigmatic smile every moment seemed like an eternity. But in the end it was always worth the wait.

I have fought in love and learnt to rise above my ego while placating my beloved. I have failed in love and i have been depressed. The world seemed dark and gloomy like hell. I have cursed myself for loving someone. I have experienced hatred when i failed in love.

But when someone LOVED me i developed the strength to let go off the past and i learnt to rise above the feeling of possession. A dialogue from Namaste London says it all:

ishq de meree mitra pehchaan kee 
mit javay jadoon zid apnan dee

Translation - 
what is the true identity of love
when you rise above your obsession for possession

I might have failed in love at some point of time but i have found the love of my life. I am glad that i LOVED and i wish at some point of their lives everyone LOVED someone/something with all their might..

Wishlist Wednesday number 3 ..

Was browsing through Preeti Shenoy's blog and found this contest. The prompt (The one thing that I wish everyone would learn is...) persuaded me to write a post on this long dead blog..

The one thing that i wish everyone would learn is "the way to figure out one's true calling/passion". 

Soon, I am going to be on the other side of 30 but I still don't have an identity? For, a man can't just be defined by a name, address or occupation. Tendulkar is defined by his passion for batting and Lata mangeshkar by her passion for singing. I wish everyone would learn the art of figuring out his/her sweet spot, enabling the person to live a meaningful life. 

I have tasted professional success, and have a healthy body, lovely friends and a family to die for. But, if i don't play Table Tenis i feel as if something is missing. I often experience "trance" while playing table tennis and boy what a feeling it is. It's meditative and i am always left wanting for more. I rise above the trivialities of success and failure, get rid of all the negative emotions: jealousy, anger, lust et al and feel so complete. I may not be the best TT player but i am the happiest guy when i play the game. 

I truly believe that once people figure out their true calling, world would be a better place to live. The negative emotions would take a back seat and people would be so full of joy. 

But right from childhood we are taught how to make a living and not how to make a life (i know its a cliched saying). Peer pressure and parental influence often pushes us into the rat race and most of us die being part of it. We start believing that having money and fame will make us successful and this success will bring joy. And, in pursuit of success we do things that make sense to our mind but don't touch our heart. We often become indifferent or start embracing negative emotions and lead a life that seems shallow. (A successful life might not seem shallow through the lens called society but we ourselves might not find it meaningful)

However, if we start following our heart, then every moment we will be doing something that makes us feel joyous. And this feeling of joy puts us on a path of excellence, enabling us to lead a meaningful life. 

MBA Admissions - Do you need a Consultant or a Mentor??

During R1 applications, I reached out to Yael, who is an MBA from NYU Stern. She has worked with one of the top i-banks and then she quit her job to be a part of NYU Stern's admissions team. I have already written a post on Yael's MBA consulting oops "MENTORING" venture - Admit1mba. But that was when i had only briefly interacted with her. Now, after working with her on my apps (Chicago and INSEAD) and getting to know her better i can say with even greater confidence that Yael is one of the best MBA mentors out there. I might not have made the final cut, but that's due to my own choices and decisions (not to pursue an MBA from a college outside top5, not to apply to more than 2 colleges etc etc).

Most importantly, lengthy discussions with Yael often bought me closer to myself. More than an MBA journey it became a journey of self realization. Time and again i have said on this blog that i spent close to 3 years on MBA apps (GMAT, School research, app, re-app) and to no avail. But the journey has made me a much better and confident person. I believe that i was lucky to work with someone like Yael and with bloggers such as "Forrest Gump", who boosted my confidence, questioned my assumptions and helped me move to the next orbit. The chief reason is that Yael and Gump are not consultants, they are mentors and friends.

Yael has just made a video where she shares the shit admissions consultants say, watch out before you head out to one. And if you really want to get help then seek a "mentor" (you know who i am talking about) ..

All da best
Sayonara

p.s - my keyboard is not working properly, pls mind the spelling mistakes :)